part deux, where I go fucking insane

not really

Lauren is adjusting, her calls go from a rant on how horrible everything is (well, it is prison, what did she expect? La-la land?) to being OK. Monday she called, and i listened to 14 minutes of her non-stop bitching, and one minute of “oh I am sorry, how are you, well I am hating this” . Then on Wednesday she called again and a totally different person and conversation. But enough time writing on the emotional drain that my DD can be.

Jed was moved to a new block, and he was able to call last night. He is doing much better, has a roomie that is cleaner and does not snore. He gets a better rec time, and the people in the block are more “normal” and not basket cases like the intensive care he was in. He sounded so much better.

His case took a turn last month, there is “new” evidence and I am not sure what happened, but it may very well get the charges dropped. His lawyer seems to think that after the tests which are the new evidence, is in, he may get lower charges. Anything please lord. Jed has said from the start, even the day when he called about the accident, that the other car ran the light. He now does not even remember that being said to me, but I remember it clearly. Chances are that is very true. If it is, next year he may be home. If it is not true, then it will be probably another 9 years before he is home. Which sucks but it is what we are all prepared for. I am not getting my hopes up, but it does sound good. Can’t go into it specifically, but, maybe there is a god after all. And that he does let truth and justice prevail. But I deep down doubt it. I can pray for a million things, but I never ever believe that anything will change on this.

I only ask one question a lot. What the fuck did I do to deserve this crap? Jed is a good person. Yeah, I know it is an age old question, why do bad things happen to good people. the bible thumpers think that by praying about it, it can change. It ain’t going to fucking change things. If praying does change things, I’ll fucking become religious. Chances of that…. 0.

anyway. rant over.
Lord, if you are truly a just, omnipotent ruler of the world, Jed does not deserve to be in jail, it was not his fault totally. The other driver was drunk too and has to shoulder his part of the blame. He was no saint. There were also drugs in his system. Not in Jed’s, he does not do drugs of any sort. So let’s get this evidence thing cleared. Feb 3rd is next court. I need some rest from this. Please.